Well, this little thing we call life is keeping me busy. And to be honest, I don't hate busy. I'm a fun loving kind of gal who enjoys people and likes to feel like I am accomplishing things. Monday and Tuesday were so well organized and productive that I was pert near giddy at times.
But the rest of the real truth is that sometimes when it is too still and quiet, I find myself feeling anxious and then I over think and over analyze my life and my children and any other random thought that becomes captive in my sometimes OCD mind.
So when Wednesday rolled around and Bo was recovering from a bout of food poisoning (that was a fun, albeit quick, little episode . . . and let me just say it will be a while before I can look at watermelon the same again), anyway, yesterday was one of those days when we were home a lot with limited mobility (mommy sanctioned, he was actually fine) and my mind stayed busier than my hands.
Never a good thing my friends. I had too much time to think about things in our lives and blow them up into mountains when they are molehills (with a few hills too).
To top it all off, sweet Tru told his lifelong best friend goodbye yesterday--he (and his fam) leave for California today. Tru has been a sweet, sobbing mess. Break my heart.
SO, as I was sitting in a hot, decompressing shower last night, I turned my music to James Taylor. You may remember that I kind of enjoy him. I had it on random play and may or may not have sobbed through "You've Got a Friend" since I happened to cherish and love the family moving to Cali too. Then "The Secret of Life" came on. And in the middle of all the steam, the words washed over me and I had a little epiphany. (Or as I like to call them, a re-piphany, because it's not the first time I have thought them.)
Here are his words:
The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time
Any fool can do it
There ain't nothing to it
Nobody knows how we got to
The top of the hill
But since we're on our way down
We might as well enjoy the ride
The secret of love is in opening up your heart
It's okay to feel afraid
But don't let that stand in your way
'cause anyone knows that love is the only road
And since we're only here for a while
Might as well show some style
Give us a smile
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsfreak.com/j/james+taylor/secret+o+life_20069179.html ]
Isn't it a lovely ride
Try not to try too hard
It's just a lovely ride
Now the thing about time is that time
Isn't really real
It's just your point of view
How does it feel for you
Einstein said he could never understand it all
Planets spinning through space
The smile upon your face
Welcome to the human race
It's not rocket science or figuring it all out or doing the things that are not scary. It's just choosing to live it well and knowing that it's all a gift. (ha, "just", it takes intention to "just choose")
Somehow that song helped bring me some peace and perspective and this morning, I turned to His word for some additional help:
"You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in You, all whose thoughts are fixed on You!" - Isaiah 26:3
"Worry weighs a person down; an encouraging word cheers a person up." - Proverbs 12:25
I'm no fool . . . I know that there will still be moments today where I am taking a deep breath or 20, but I certainly feel less bogged down than yesterday.
9 hours ago